The Alabama Moderate

Painting the Red State Purple.

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Archive for the ‘Laugh It Off’ Category

Limbaugh Humor

Posted by ALmod on October 10, 2009

As much as I really don’t like Rush Limbaugh, and despite the fact that I almost never agree with him, I actually found his crack about Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize to be snicker-inducing:

“Can you imagine, folks, how big Obama’s head is today?” Rush Limbaugh, the conservative talk-show host, told his listeners. “I think it’s getting so big that his ears actually fit.”

Now before I get blasted by the left (again), remember that Obama himself has cracked on the size of his ears.  Ear jokes are funny!


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Ahoy, Landlubber!!

Posted by ALmod on September 19, 2009

Yaaarrr!  Today be International Talk Like a Pirate Day!

Posted in Laugh It Off, Tibits | Tagged: | Comments Off on Ahoy, Landlubber!!

Is This What Americans Want? Really?

Posted by ALmod on September 17, 2009

It was the acceptance speech hijack heard around the world– or at least the part of the world that watches the VMAs.  Taylor Swift won an award and started thanking everyone when Kanye West snatched her mic away and declared that Beyonce Knowles should have won.  (I might add that I gained a ton of respect for Knowles as a result of her actions upon winning an award herself.)

Everyone has been talking about it all week.  It was rude.  It was inappropriate.  And of course, President Obama was asked about it.  Here’s what he said:

That also sparked this rather funny video:

Now, I have to admit…  It’s hard to not agree with the president on that one, but then I also noticed his poll numbers for this week.  RCP shows an average of +9.5 points in the polls.  CNN and Bloomberg show gains of 18 and 19 points, respectively.  Seriously?!  That’s what it takes to get high poll numbers?!

I guess instead of having him do anything really important, like getting us out of a recession or fixing health care, we should just have him do the Cheers and Jeers section for TV Guide.

Posted in Entertainment, Laugh It Off | Tagged: , , , | Comments Off on Is This What Americans Want? Really?

Obama’s Further Attempts to Indoctrinate Children

Posted by ALmod on September 7, 2009

Yesterday, I addressed the problems with Obama’s school speech and his plans to use the very holiday of Christmas to spread his evil lies.  Today, I will reveal his more sinister plans.

As we all know, the Kenyan government has plotted his election since the 1960s.  Barack Hussein Obama was not born in the United States and is therefore not eligible to be our president.  We all know the rest of the story about the false newspaper birth announcement and his forged birth certificate, but this scandal goes much deeper than most people realize.

Chicago has given us many things, but there’s something that many people overlook.  Quaker Oats is headquartered in Chicago.  That sounds innocent enough until you look at some of the details.  Quaker Oats currently produces several brand name kids’ cereals and Aunt Jemima pancakes, among other things.  It’s also owned by the very liberal company Pepsico, which has been very publicly denounced by family oriented groups and even boycotted for their support of the gay rights filth-filled agenda within their own private corporation.  If anyone has any question as to which side of the political spectrum Pepsico leans, one only needs to watch these two very NOT SAFE FOR WORK commercials:

So here we have a very liberal-leaning company that is based out of Chicago.  Is there any question that this is a company that might bend to the will of The One?

You might have noticed a line of Pepsi and Mountain Dew drinks labeled as “Throwback.”  These drinks contain sugar instead of corn syrup and are supposed to be the first in a line of Pepsi products that are a “throwback” to their earlier counterparts.  Children’s breakfast cereal is in line to be included.  If you might recall, one of the cool toys to get back in the 1950s was a “secret decoder ring.”  Parents beware.  Pepsi plans to bring this back along with secret codes that will be given during children’s programing on Saturday mornings and weekday afternoons.  It is quite obvious that Pepsico plans to use these messages to spread their (and Obama’s) liberal message to our children.

Please write your newspapers, congressmen, and other leaders and tell them that this is unacceptable.  Call your grocery stores and let them know that you refuse to shop there until they pull every single child’s breakfast cereal off their shelves!  In fact, if you see a store that so much as has milk in stock, I suggest leaving your cart and walking out right then and there.  We will NOT stand for this very brazen attempt to get to our kids!

Obama O'sEDIT:  As if all this wasn’t enough, there’s actually an Obama breakfast cereal slated to be released.  The radio song even goes so far as to sing, “Mommy, can I have some please?”  This is sure to get your little one begging you to buy it.  Not since “I want my Maypo!” have we seen such an attempt to get kids to annoy their parents.

Posted in Laugh It Off, Satire | Tagged: , , , , , | Comments Off on Obama’s Further Attempts to Indoctrinate Children

Obama Set to Use Christmas for Propaganda

Posted by ALmod on September 6, 2009

As you may have heard, U.S. President Barack Hussein Obama plans to deliver a speech to school children on Tuesday.  This shameful attempt to indoctrinate our children is without excuse for certain; however, it would be my great pleasure if I could only tell you that it ends there.

As you may know, our younger population is quite fascinated with the Internet and various “social networking” sites.  One popular website is YouTube, where they make their own videos and post them for the world to see.  For those of you who are not aware, our president has for some time been posting speeches to this website which very clearly push his policy goals.  Our young people are exposed to this indoctrination and have been for some time.  Of course, we all know how parents play the greater role in making sure our kids are using their computer time responsibly.  I would urge parents out there to make sure that they are not using this YouTube site so that their impressionable minds are not exposed to this shameful whoring of the president’s Marxist agenda.

My fellow Americans, I have also noticed his use of prime time networks to push his agenda.  This is during the time when your kids will be home from school but have not yet gone to bed.  Such an attempt by a president to drill his propaganda into our heads is completely unprescedented.  And as if the television were not enough, his administration attempts to reach us via the written word in emails and newspapers.

Now, word has reached me that the president plans to even use our sacred, Christian holiday of Christmas to push his agenda!  Believe it or not, the President of the United States plans to peddle his message in a cutsey “family oriented” Christmas delivery of some sort.  I wouldn’t be surprised if they shoved that new First Fleabag in front of the cameras as well!  But don’t be fooled by the gushy exterior.  This is in fact a way for the president to endear himself to Americans.  It’s nothing more than red and green propaganda.

Of course the Obamas don’t have to worry about how insulting this is for us Christians since they are in fact practicing Muslims.  But just how far are we willing to let them go in this War on Christmas?  Every year it gets worse and worse!

I am urging all my readers to write to your senators and representatives– even state legislators and gubernatorial candidates and the White House itself if you can.  Ask them to stop this obvious attack on our values and our traditions by using them for political gain.  We may never get back the airwaves and the printed media when it comes to propaganda, but we will NOT stand for letting them use Christmas in this way.

Posted in Laugh It Off, Satire | Tagged: , , | 5 Comments »

Prickly City vs. Birthers

Posted by ALmod on August 28, 2009

I absolutely love Scott Stantis’s Prickly City.  I read it every day.  This week, he’s been touching on the birther nonsense, and today made me laugh out loud.

Prickly City, Scott Stantis, 08/28/09

Prickly City, Scott Stantis, 08/28/09

Posted in Laugh It Off | Tagged: , , | Comments Off on Prickly City vs. Birthers

“The dog doesn’t speak French, sweetie.”

Posted by ALmod on August 26, 2009

Above is a self quote I never imagined I’d hear– until about 5 minutes ago.

Isabella has recently discovered the fine art of getting the dog to do tricks for her if she gives the dog a treat.  I gave Isabella a couple of dog treats, and I went about unloading the washing machine.  I heard the following:


“Roll over!”


“Roll over!”



“Now say, ‘Bonjour!'”

Posted in Laugh It Off | Tagged: , , , , | 1 Comment »

Chuck Norris Endorses Roy Moore

Posted by ALmod on August 26, 2009

Looks like Barrens chat today will be a little more interesting.  I just hope we don’t see another commercial like this with Roy Moore in it.

Posted in Alabama Government, Elections, Laugh It Off, Video Games | Tagged: , , , , | Comments Off on Chuck Norris Endorses Roy Moore and Jon Stewart vs. Betsy McCaughey

Posted by ALmod on August 26, 2009

A lot of other folks have already posted on this, but I was waiting on the response from before I covered it as well.  I did leave a rather lengthy comment over at Left in Alabama, though.  For those who haven’t seen the interview, you can find it in its full unedited form here (part 1) and here (part 2).  I’ll warn you that it’s rather uncomfortable to watch.

What you’ll see is McCaughey reading a passage from (I believe) HB3200 to try to prove her euthanasia claim.  Further, she’s arguing that the clause regarding seeing your doctor for what amounts to setting up a living will would not be voluntary.  McCaughey’s argument was that the bill gave incentives to doctors for providing this service and would therefore make it something that doctors rammed down their patients’ throats.  Here’s the portion she read that “proved” her point.

H.R. 3200, page 431-432: (1) PHYSICIAN’S QUALITY REPORTING INITIATIVE.—Section 1848(k)(2) of the Social Security Act 19 (42 U.S.C. 1395w–4(k)(2)) is amended by adding at the end the following new paragraphs: (3) PHYSICIAN’S QUALITY REPORTING INITIATIVE.— (A) IN GENERAL.—For purposes of reporting data on quality measures for covered professional services furnished during 2011 and any subsequent year, to the extent that measures are available, the Secretary shall include quality measures on end of life care and advanced care planning that have been adopted or endorsed by a consensus-based organization, if appropriate. Such measures shall measure both the creation of and adherence to orders for life-sustaining treatment.”

Now, if you look at this as is or listen to someone read it, you might be inclined to agree with McCaughey.  The problem is that you’d be skimming and not actually reading it.  And listening to someone read it isn’t exactly going to give you the opportunity to break it down and see it for what it actually says.  In other words, McCaughey’s argument depends heavily on you not reading or understanding the passage in question.  So let’s break this down a bit…

“For purposes of reporting data…”  This is for reporting purposes.

“…on quality measures for covered professional services furnished during 2011 and any subsequent year, to the extent that measures are available…”  They’re reporting what services were covered and what was available.

“…the Secretary shall include quality measures on end of life care and advanced care planning that have been adopted or endorsed by a consensus-based organization, if appropriate.”  This is big wording for saying that whatever is reported might include (but isn’t limited to) how many such consultations they did.

“Such measures shall measure both the creation of and adherence to orders for life-sustaining treatment.”  The key words here are “life-sustaining.”  This means exactly what it says.

And as points out, McCaughey’s claim that this somehow affects a physician’s “quality rating” is false.

What McCaughey didn’t count on and what so many others before her have taken for granted is the fact that Stewart is no dummy, and he doesn’t just nod his head and listen.  Nor does he follow the Bill O’Reilly formula of simply yelling over the other person.  Stewart allowed her to first make her argument and even produce the portion of the bill that she said proves her point.  Stewart probably would have been either a lawyer or investment banker had he not gone into comedy, and he saw right through the bullshit and interpreted the passage exactly as it was– line by line– to prove her wrong.  McCaughey was left with saying, “You’re wrong,” as her main argument.  She simply couldn’t produce the wording to back her claims, and what she did produce, Stewart read back to her to show her error.

To boot, McCaughey actually added to her argument that decisions made by a patient while they were still of sound mind and body were not really what the patient would want when they were no longer able to voice their wishes.  In short, the one arguing that health care reform would take away your choices was actually arguing that your wishes should not be followed if she (or someone else) didn’t personally agree with them– that your choices should be ignored.  Why?  Because you wouldn’t really know what you wanted unless you were unconscious and unable to convey your wishes?

Then McCaughey referred to as “”  It’s nice to think that Fact Check is the only fact checking site or source out there.  Unfortunately, there are several, and I haven’t found one that agrees with her.  And invoking, as our former vice president found out, is a sure fire way to get them to respond.  Calling the nonpartisan watchdog groups liars isn’t exactly the best way to prove your point.

Oddly enough, McCaughey resigned the next day.  From what?  Well it might explain where her true interests lie, but McCaughey was the director of a medical company.  The company, among other things, sells medical equipment and would likely have a much smaller bottom line after the passage of a health care reform bill.  Sounds familiar.

Posted in Federal Government, Health and Wellness, Laugh It Off, Mainstream Media | Tagged: , , , , | Comments Off on and Jon Stewart vs. Betsy McCaughey

Quote of the Day

Posted by ALmod on August 20, 2009

Jon Stewart (to Fox News) – “Welcome to liberalism, f**kos!  See you guys at Sean Penn’s barbecue this weekend.  We’re haveing tofu bourguignon– it’s French AND vegan!”

The Daily Show last night was absolutely hillarious!  The quote from above was from the end of a segment (which you can watch if you follow the link above) where he compared the views expressed on Fox News to what they describe liberals to be.  At the end, only one conclusion could be reached.  Fox News is liberal.

Posted in Laugh It Off, Mainstream Media | Tagged: , , , , | Comments Off on Quote of the Day